(Chastity South Africa)
Article by Marc Aupiais
I am walking in the thick snow, by the edge of movement. I look up, seeing a small red bird, and am wondering at the soul of it. Perhaps I tossed and turned, I do not know, all I remember is what I describe, and perhaps more- but not the context. The bird made small noises and I truly wondered- are you aeviternal? I did not know what aeviternal meant, but still I wondered- at the concept I did not comprehend as yet... nor did I use the blessed word aeviternal for it, something more like fully alive!
I looked to the side, the snow was moving, there was an avalanche of sorts, I guess. I walked towards it, I was on the top of the mountain now, and I took something sparkling, something shining, like a fire perhaps from the cold snow. It was golden in form, though not too cold or dead, I think, it was a secret.
I would have awoken and written a poem in my diary about the experience, or perhaps I was awake, and the idea simply entered my mind, a scary idea- of being there on that mountain- simply surrounded in chaos, in death, and diving deep into it to save something important, and leaving once I had.
The golden piece was a woman's soul, that was the meaning, and I was sent there- to the danger to save her, or so I had thought when contemplating the odd poetic thought.
We have a task in our world, and when we achieve it, or fail- we are to turn into dust and fly upon the wind until we come to face the truth,with pain or joy, or any sort of reacting.
We save our fellows physically, but also with more than this. True freedom is freedom to be our deepest being, to become what we truly are. What we truly are is never evil- that is what we think we are, and what we think we are desires to imprison who we are. We think to quickly that we hate, or desire evil on others, or to do wrong. Our evil shadow does, and we sin by treating this as ours- and that is why we confess our sins, but every sin is self delusion, every sin is a lie, and malicious lies even the smallest destroy all things.
So, Jesus came into our world to undo the Devil's work, not God's law, not morality, not the power of the conscience of the soul- no- he came not to change the requirements of salvation- but to save us from his enemy- to slavery to thoughts, and desires- we only think falsely as our own.
When I truly gained self control- it was by seeing sin as foreign to my self.
I also need the sacrament, and to realize the choice is mine- and the power so strongly desiring evil- it is not the devil- but me allowing my desires to misfire, and believing something is my desire when it is not. This is where faith saves us- where realization of true, whole reality- and this is what faith is- saves.
We are to calm our souls- and undress our pride to around our knees. We are to lower our souls, and step back from our body, and feel calmness within- we are to notice our emotions, but detach from them, and hear them as voices- as guides, advisors, and competitors, and with each, call it aside like a pet sparrow. We must hold it on our hand and speak to it, and ask who it is, and who its parents are- until we realize our true desire. When one realizes the true desire, beyond the good or evil form- one can choose how to manifest it, and we may only sanely choose what is good- least we fool ourselves. We must focus on the source of our desire. It is something in reality- something we want or do not want, some warning, or some chilling fearful realization. Emotions are like intuition, they tell us about ourselves, and how we read what is.
Jesus came to cause us life forever- and life to the fullness- not in events- but in who we stand to be and become- not in appearances, but in our depths, and aching organs. By prayer, belief, trust, obedience, and by philosophy (the literal meaning of this), the love of truth- we shall find right.
Philosophy is the seeking of the source of things, so that we can admit their source. Theology and philosophy are not one, but in the virtue of self control- seeing what our source emotion is, our real situation- that below the misfiring- we can concentrate on it, and strengthen it- breaking the icy stranglehold of the chains of slavery to sin- simply by inflating the righteous desire we truly feel- which evil has stolen, hijacked and twisted.
Like a beast loosed on the town, with something tied to it to cause it panic- evil loves to look at our weaknesses, the desires we keep under- the righteous ones below the evil the manifest- and to set these into a slight spinning of tissue- so that we fall vastly out of control- like a wild black horse rampaging through a small desert town.
Such a beast desires comfort, but to it- it thinks it desires to throw off the thing holding it, or else- that it hates those it sees, as it causes damage, like in madness.
Truly, to conquer the sin beneath, at the source- and to throw the soul into balance, by admitting our true desires, and believing them- we in fact calmly stop rampaging, and can logically remove what captivates us. Like the horse we need help, not from people who would use us to slave for their tasks, but from one who values our freedom, but more than that our sanity, without which freedom is worthless, and without morals, we are not in perfect sanity.
Our source of freedom, is like a fence the horse goes to in the end, where a young boy quietly frees his and sends him off. Our freedom is in seeking the true, deepest source of our desires, and then also in the salvation wrought by the sacrament, and by the church which helps solidify our efforts, and truly puts our soul (our current aeviternal form, which is like the battery, and animator of our every essence of being, flesh, blood, and living part) right, even as we are more than encouraged to fix our body, which includes our mind.
We are more than conquerers, when fighting evil with truth, and goodwill, we are soldiers, centurions, with a clear avatar, and emblem on our shields and on our souls- the silver and gold emblem of sanity, upon the platinum shield of truth, and morality.
The perfection of sanity and morality are one and the same, for to be truly moral is to be truly sane, and sanity is the mind's state which does what our mother church defines as moral, in tradition and magisterium. Let us fight our sin, by converting our desires into what they truly are, and ourselves also- and by prayer, power, love, empathy- and the realization infinite- that unwarranted mercy to oppressors, is unjust persecution of the oppressed.
Friday, 7 November 2008
Chastity South Africa- The small freedom I guarentee you, that which we die for, and give our life to
Labels:
Chastity,
Chastity South Africa,
Overcoming Lust,
Overcoming sin,
overcoming temptation,
prayer,
proportion,
Sainity is perfection of morals and morals are the actions of sanity,
True Love
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